Fixating on and focusing on a phrase or a few words is the province of those with very small minds. I recently got a full dose of this.
However, it wasn't as bad as the two and one half hour board meeting that we had a few years ago when a homeowner argued over one word in the minutes. The homeowner had not even been present in the meeting.
It is profoundly depressing to try to explain things to people who are so hung up on their own little view that they squeeze it to death. They do not want to hear or understand the big picture of what you are trying to say. You could tell some of these folks that a tornado was about to hit and they would argue for hours over what the word "hit" means.
These are usually the same people who insist on having the last word in spite of almost all their words being laughable while completely missing the big picture. It is like they cannot see the water in the picture because of the rain. They rarely search for any context or take the time to read background materials. They are the modern-day experts of everything. They refuse to learn from the past. They apparently were born knowing everything and how to handle every situation. Their smug attitude is hard to take.
The reality is that most of them are pathetic little people who would have a hard time fighting their way out of a paper bag. They thrive off being parasites on people trying to accomplish something worthwhile. Their accomplishments are only in their minds. They would rather email than talk in person. Unfortunately, these people are usually the same people who believe themselves to be above the rules. They subscribe to the end justifying the means. It is a sure sign that they have yet to earn their battle scars or see enough end results to understand that you need to do things by the rules if you want what you have done to stand the test of time.
I care deeply about rules, whether they are Robert's Rules of Order, the US Constitution, or the compensation plan that I have had with my employers. We have rules so that we can have an orderly society and things get done fairly and efficiently. McCallie, where I attended military high school, got that message on rules through to me even as a teenager. If you didn't follow the rules, you spent your free Saturday afternoons walking around the track.
Even worse, some people in power cannot stand it when they are shown to be violating the rules. They want to do what they want to do. The rules are little more than a distraction to be avoided in their mind. Bending or searching for a way around rules is the wrong way of approaching problem resolution. Stick to the rules and it becomes easy to say, "We are doing this because the law requires us to do it this way". When you have the law at your side, it is a great comfort. When you try to bend the law to meet your needs, you should expect it to snap back and whack you in the face. I have seen it happen many times.
It also occurs to me that the true measure of any person only shows during times of adversity. When you cannot tell a good faith attempt to help from an attack, you need to step back and reassess what you are doing and how you are doing it. You have likely gone off the rails and are most certainly missing the big picture of what is really important to you. During tough times, you should especially cling to the rules and whatever precedents that you can find for handling the situation. They are the road maps through minefields.
Rules are guideposts to follow, not things to shun. My recent experience with explaining the rules to people has reinforced my view that most people believe that ignoring the rules is okay especially if you get the result you want. People hate being called out on rules so much that they will attack you just for pointing out the rules. Attacking someone is something a good leader resists.
Attacking an individual when you are a person in power is just plain wrong. It ranks among the most pathetic behaviors of those in power. Attacking someone who is trying to help is an even more grievous error. If you cannot tell help from an attack, is it any wonder why no one respects you?
Respect has to be earned. Yet, few people are willing to do the work required.
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